Do you ever find yourself asking Why me? Why did this happen? Why did I lose momentum again?
Let's explore why it's important to be extra careful with your inner (and outer dialogue). When we ask ourselves high quality questions, we challenge ourselves to come up with high quality answers. But if we ask ourselves poor quality questions, we tend to give poor answers. Let's look at some examples:
When someone asks themselves over and over again, why do I always sleep in by the end of the week and miss out on consistently going to the gym? they tend to say things like I'm so lazy, I really should do better, I'm the worst, or I'm never going to get fit. None of these responses serve the bigger goal of exercising consistently or making health a priority. If we ask a higher quality question, our brain will automatically start working on finding a solution.
What if we asked any of the following questions instead?
What could I do next week to ensure that I get up at the same time every day?
What are some of the obstacles that might be getting in my way and how could I create a plan to overcome them?
Who could I reach out to support me with my goal?
What type of habits do I need to develop the night before to set me up for a successful morning?
Do you see how these questions require a little more brainpower but automatically have us thinking in an entirely different direction? Although why questions can be very helpful at times, sometimes they lead to excuses or negative responses that can have us feeling like a victim. Alternatively, what, how, and where questions usually challenge us to explore how we can be better.
See below for some more high quality questions that could shift you in the right direction when faced with every day challenges or adversity:
How can I learn from this situation?
How could I develop better habits so that I minimize the chance of this happening again?
What obstacles currently exist that I might not be aware of or have yet to overcome?
What types of people do I need to be around to keep my mindset focused on success?
Who could I reach out to support me with this project?
Who do I need to be to set myself up for a win?
What type of traits do I need to develop or work on to make sure that I hit my targets this month?
What support is already available that I could tap into to help keep me on track?
Take some time today to reflect on the kind of questions you ask yourself each day and then challenge yourself to write down some higher quality questions that will support you with achieving your goals.
“Successful people ask better questions, and as a result, they get better answers.”
- Tony Robbins
Helen Marie Fox is a Success Coach and Mentor who has helped hundreds of individuals and groups perform at their best. Her strategic approach to goal achievement leaves people armed with the knowledge, skills and essential mindset required to create change. Read more.